Why I Write.

Once again, I have waited far too long to write. I always forget the therapeutic power of writing. There is a certain beauty about being able to release thoughts and emotions, without anyone or anything interrupting them. You are able to put into words exactly what is going through your mind. Sometimes, when someone is standing right in front of you, it’s not as easy to express things in the same way you can when they are written, or typed. Although I do miss the days where I would long for nothing more, but the moment when I would open my locker, and a neatly folded note would fall to my feet. I can still feel that moment, my heart fluttering. Whether it was from my friend, or a boy, it made me feel excited nonetheless.

Since we are going down this path, I have to say, I prefer the ways of communication from when I was in high school; Notes, letters, and phone calls. It was exciting, spontaneous, and included much more effort then the way we communicate today. I guess I’ve always been enamored with the art of writing. The human mind can express a multitude of emotions, memories, and thoughts when presented with the correct setting and atmosphere. When you write, you can go back and edit, you can read over what you just wrote, and enhance it. Spoken words cannot be changed. This is the true beauty of writing! You can work on it until you feel that it fully expresses what you feel; It’s just amazing.

I still have a box of journals somewhere in my parents’ attic, with about two dozen completely filled journals. For a few years, every single day of my life was basically recorded. It astounds me how my love for writing started at such an early age. Basically at the age of 12, I started writing every single night. Sometimes I think I should do that again! I had all sorts of journals and diaries. Some even had a lock and key! Going to the store with my parents to buy a new journal was something I looked forward to so much! Even until this day, I have a planner, and it ends up being sort of like a journal. It really eases the mind.

I know this entry is random, but I have a lot of things going on in my mind at the moment, and I actually thought this entry was going to be about something completely different! Funny how the mind wanders where it pleases. After I have written something, I honestly cannot wait to go back and read it. I know that sounds strange, but my own thoughts and entries make me smile, laugh, and even tear up sometimes. I feel the same way when I do hair, when I cook, or do any of my many and always changing passions. It’s like taking a step back and thinking, “hmm, I did that? Not bad Jen.. not bad at all.” After all, amidst all of our efforts to remain modest and humble, sometimes we just need to be proud of ourselves, right?

Thank you for taking the time to read my entry, it means the world.

What’s Bad for the Heart..

I once heard a quote, I don’t quite remember where, and it went something like this..

“What’s bad for the Heart, is good for the Art.”

This did not make sense to me at the moment, but now it does. Being an Artist is both a blessing, and a curse. Feeling things so fucking deeply is such a curse. I mean, it’s great to be emotional and in tune with your feelings, but it’s so hard, and draining to be so emotional about every damn thing. I guess I would rather feel something than feel nothing. I don’t even know anymore to be honest. Goodnight.

Nothing But You.

If you’re wondering why, then let me explain.. to the best of my heart’s ability.

I know that you think my soul is too quickly consumed by this sensation, that there should be a certain time I should feel the things I do. However, the truth is, there is no amount of time that is necessary. When you feel like a dozen butterflies, (yes, I know it’s cliche), but a dozen butterflies are fluttering in your rib cage, there’s no other explanation. If you want to know why, I will tell you even if you don’t want to know why, I will tell you anyway. This list, this summary, it will grow, because it’s the little things that make me fall for you. Every day, every smile, and every touch.

…Because of the way your passion shines through what you do for a living. The way you focus on helping strangers around you, and your determination to make it better.

..Because of the way you ask me if I need anything, not because you have to, but because you want to.

..Because of the way you do the little things I do. The way my every day habits and hobbies rub off on you. The way you mix honey into your tea, and drink it at night out of a coffee mug that could suffice as a soup bowl.

..Because of your blue eyes that not only look into mine, but for how deeply they pierce into my soul without you even having a clue.

..Because of your young soul. The way you could be a man, and also hold tight to youthful bliss.

..Because of the way you tease me, and play with me like a child.

..Because of the way you think of me, and go out of your way to bring me something meaningful.

..Because of your generous heart.

And last but not least..

..Because of the way you make me feel safe when I am close to you, when I feel your heart beating next to mine, and the way my body and mind melt into your warmth; The way you make me feel like like nothing could hurt me.

Nothing but you of course.

Love is..


The idea of love has always been a mystery to me. I guess I always wondered why such a beautiful feeling was always linked with such pain. When I look back at my experiences, I try and think about which loves in my life have really stood out to me, and if most of them even WERE love. My heart is aching tonight for reasons I cannot fully explain in this entry, or even to myself for that matter. I am learning that love isn’t always that tingly feeling in your stomach. Love is real, it’s raw, it shakes you to your core. It makes you stronger, it challenges you, it makes you want to be better, and most importantly, it makes you feel alive.

Sometimes our love for our careers or passions are the strongest ones, because they cannot hurt us in the same way that another soul can. This is why I always say I LOVE my career.. because it will never leave me or abandon me. When I want to feel this love, all I have to do is create; It’s in my hands, in my art. SO thankful for that. I can’t even begin to explain how crazy my life has been these past few years, and I know it’s just the beginning. Been taking many leaps of faith, praying to God he will catch me when I fall; and He has. I have made it through some tough times, and I am certain there will be more. They make me stronger, they thicken my skin. They made me who I am today, and I am thankful for that.

I’ve come to realize something very critical in this journey to find love, and it is this; Love is most deeply felt when it is reciprocated. One sided love will drain our hearts, eventually leaving us empty and hollow. The only way to truly feel the depth of love, to really swim in it’s waters, and feel it in your bones, is to receive it back. That is the true beauty of it. It is not always returned, but when you do find that reflection, and that feeling is returned in full, it is the most beautiful thing in the world. It makes it all worth it. I’ve found this in the past, but it has slipped away. I’ve learned to never lose faith, and to keep my heart open no matter how many times it has been torn apart, and stitched back together.

Creative Energy for the Artist’s Mind.


Often times, I look back at my creative journey, and reflect on how far I have come as an artist. I will never wonder what would have happened if I picked a different career path, because I know this is what I was meant to do. I have learned a lot during this beautiful adventure; one thing being how incredibly important creative energy is to help your work thrive and flourish.

Now I realize this is a term that some people will not understand, seeing as it is something that someone with a creative mind would fully comprehend. The environment, and the atmosphere that us artists are surrounded by will very much affect our craft. If our surroundings and aura is negative, this will automatically be reflected in our work. I have found this to be true, over and over again. I was recently blessed to have found somewhere that my art could live up to it’s fullest potential. Being surrounded by positive energy, and an environment filled with creative and passionate souls who share the same love as I do, is something that is essential to me. I am thankful to have found this, and I can see a difference in the work I do. In this place, I can feel the adrenaline and passion that push me to be better, and wanting to be better is a huge part of this career.

I once heard a quote many years ago that stuck with me until this day. “Complacency is the kiss of death.” I believe it was Tabatha Coffey, one of my biggest inspirations in the hair world, that said this during one of her shows. I couldn’t agree with this more. Once you become complacent for far too long, you stop growing. This is why I believe that you need to listen to your heart when you are in this career field. When your art work is affected by the energy around you in a negative way, you should do anything in your power to find the place where your art will thrive freely. I hope all the artists out there can find this place of growth, for the sake of your beautiful creations.

My Own Company.

"I wish I could show you, when you are lonely or in darkness, the astonishing light of your own being." -Hafiz

“I wish I could show you, when you are lonely or in darkness, the astonishing light of your own being.”

All Photographs on my blog are taken by me. This is one of my favorites from my Autumn 2014 Photography Session.

Well, I was about to publish a post, and I forgot to save it. I could have closed my laptop, and said forget it. However, I decided to write another post on this cold evening. The other one obviously wasn’t meant to be seen. I’ve had a lot of time this year to think about what I have learned. Not only about life, but also about myself.

Some people don’t have enough time to themselves, while others have too much. I believe I have found a balance between the two. Sometimes being alone can be amazing, a breath of fresh air. Your mind can rest and find peace. Sometimes it is lonely, even scary at times.

I’ve said this before, and I will say it again; this past year has been such a phenomenal journey for me. I went through times where I didn’t think I could hold it all together, and ended up not only overcoming, but becoming stronger. I believe that learning how to enjoy ones own company is something beautiful and crucial. I pray that one day I can look back, and be so thankful for this abundant time I have been blessed with to be on my own. Anxiety lies in the unknown, uncertain moments of life; Anxiety subsides when we adjust to change, and find our peace, our happy place.

Do I want more? Of course I do.. but it’s not my time yet. It is time to enjoy the journey at hand. Day by day. I hope you can do the same.

Enjoy The Journey.

Sometimes it astounds me how quickly time flies before our eyes. It seems like only yesterday I was playing in the park with my friends, and now I am in my own apartment, wondering what’s in store for me.

Is it just me, or do we always feel this pressure to live up to what society wants us to do? That we should have this amazing career, a house, a husband, and kids by the time we are reaching our 30’s..? Who’s to say that we can’t make our own timeline and push that pressure aside?

Until recently, I have felt this pressure upon me more than ever, I have come to the realization that everyone has their our journey, and their own timeline. Just because the girl next to you has 3 kids, a beautiful home, and everything seems to be falling into place, doesn’t mean that your journey is wrong in any way. It’s your own story. We should be proud of how far we have come in this crazy world, and give ourselves credit for the achievements and hardships that we have conquered. Every day holds a surprise and a step closer to the next chapter. Why do we have to be on the same page as everyone else?

I decided that until my time comes to settle down and have children of my own, I will pour myself into my passions, my art, and my self growth. It’s been a while since I have written a blog, and I need to do it more, because it clears my mind and helps me organize my thoughts. That’s the problem sometimes.. we keep everything inside without a healthy outlet.

Please stay with me throughout my journey, and thank you for reading my entry today. I hope that your journey is helping you grow.