I woke up at 7:00am, a swirl of uninvited thoughts running through my mind; running through my dreams. Through my unfocused vision, I could see the gloomy clouds outside my window, and the rain drops gathered on the now vacant flower pots outside. Waking up to the vision of pine trees every morning is one thing I am thankful for. I close my eyes, and pull the soft fleece blanket around my neck, hoping to drift into a slumber once again. Apparently, my mind has other plans, so I decide to make some pumpkin tea with brown sugar, and share my thoughts with you.
Since I’ve been on my own, I have experienced a few luxuries, one of them being a steady sleep schedule. Falling asleep to silence, and waking up to it as well. This is one thing I know I will never take for granted. I do, however, pray that one day I wake up to different things. To someone that loves me, to hot coffee brewing, to a soft kiss on my cheek from someone who just can’t live without me. Those are just dreams for now. The dreams that apparently wake me up at 7:00am.
Why is it that humans tend to focus on the things they want, the things they are missing, rather then the things they have achieved, and how far they have come? I am guilty of this, and it’s something I feel I need to work on. Maybe it’s because my expectations of myself are so high, maybe it’s because I want to do things different than my parents did, or maybe because after countless disappointments, my patience is fading.
Solitude is a fascinating thing. It has a way of making you feel lonely, and strong at the same time. I am thankful for the time I have for myself. It’s an experience I know I will never regret.
Journey to Happiness 